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THE ROYAL WEDDING: Do The Middletons Realise What They’ve Gotten Their Children Into?

August 24, 2011

By Dan Delicious
Stirring Trouble Internationally

I wonder, I just wonder whether the Middletons, the parents I mean, realise what they have gotten their children into with that royal marriage?

Yes, sure, at all looks like a fairytale at the moment: their Katie has married into royalty and is looking at the prospect of becoming queen one day. Financially she should be secure from now on, even if that ‘brute’ dumps her at some point and goes after a much younger chick, who is probably born as you read this, with some meat on her, if you know what I mean.

THE MIDDLETONS: Oh dear. Too late to turn back now, their baby girl is now a Windsor.

And the younger daughter, Pippa, is supposedly looking set to make a bundle out of her new found status as the sister of the future queen. Pippa would have probably made it even without the royal connection, but now it all looks even more interesting and financially rewarding.

As for their brother James, he seems to the be the sort of lad who has already prepared himself for a new life in the fast lane, having opened like a dozen companies to make some serious moolah. Won’t let us down, the Middleton’s are probably saying to themselves, looking lovingly at young Jamie. The future looks good for him.

And as for Ma Middletton and Pa Middleton, well, they should make a few bob for themselves in catering, on top of what they’ve already made on the royal wedding, with the patter of the little feet hopefully coming soon.

Yep, seemingly things are looking good for the Middleton clans, even though most of them will never again get invited for tea at the Palace.

But in the real world it doesn’t really work like that. Trouble lies ahead for all the younger Middletons, with Katie finding it very tough to handle her now found position, just like it happened with her late mother-in-law, who quickly realised that being a wife of the future king is not at all like she imagined from reading all those fairytales and watching fantasy films. Nope, it’s quite a drag really, especially if you are not very bright and like to party a lot and do pretty much nothing. A pleasure cruise it ain’t, that’s for certain.

And as for her sister and brother, they will also find out very quickly that being related to the wife of the future king has its serious drawbacks. Like, for example, every time they would be venturing into some sort of business, they would find that all sorts of dodgy characters would be targeting them, in the hope of using their ‘connections’. Or, even worse, they would be accused of profiting from their family ties to the Royal Family.

And it will eventually come to a point when both Pippa and James would realise that they can’t really make all that wonderful money that they dreamt of making. And it would start to get on their nerves and they would not understand how come is it that that they can’t become fabulously rich, when it looked so promising initially. And they might even start doing silly things and getting into trouble, like it happened before them with so many people, who tried to use their royal family connections. And it would all become embarrassing, with sister Katie avoiding them.

Yes, life’s a bitch, guys and girls. If you bite off more than you can chew, you choke on it.

Uncle Gary would probably be the only one in the family who might get some benefit out of his new found fame initially. But it won’t last too long, as he is bound to overstep the boundaries, considering his past occupations and habits. In fact, it might even backfire on him, being the simple soul that he is.

So, anyway you look at it, it doesn’t really bide well for the Middletons. They should have had their Katie marry a successful dentist. Would have made more sense for everyone.

– End –

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